


open up

by seventhswan



Category: Persona 5
Genre: M/M, Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-12-27 19:00:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12087345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seventhswan/pseuds/seventhswan
Summary: Halfway through the movie, Akira’s hand touches the back of Yusuke's, where it’s resting palm down on the armrest.





	open up

**Author's Note:**

> Set before the third palace.
> 
> Warning for: vague, brief mentions of child abuse/neglect.

**i.**

The shadow is monstrous, double-headed and steadily dripping back slime. All around them, Mementos’ walls are pulsing like something organic, as though they’re in the chamber of some great, rotten heart. 

“Joker?” Ann says, taking a step back in horror. Her hand comes up to shield her nose against the smell.

“This isn’t right,” Morgana says, intercepting the question before Akira can ask it. They seem linked to each other, sometimes, as though they can read one another’s minds.

It’s only their third time in Mementos together as a team, but Yusuke has seen enough to know it shouldn’t be this way. Virtually all shadows are malevolent, but this one –

“Shido,” the shadow rasps, the gaping mouth opening wide. “He’s mine. He’s _mine_.”

When it attacks, it’s lightning fast; it leaks some kind of poison that crosses Ryuji’s eyes and leaves him giggling on the pulsing floor, no help to anyone.

“Stand your ground!” Joker instructs. Leanan Sidhe, his favorite persona, bobs anxiously in the air around him, radiating concern.

Yusuke has something to prove – they’ve let him in their team, a team so close-knit and loving it seems like they don’t need anyone else, and he so badly wants them to need him. He pushes Goemon to land a critical hit, and another. His hand fumbles on the grip of his gun, but his aim is true. The bullets crack as they hit their mark, echoing through the chamber.

“Keep it up,” Joker says, and slaps his palm against Yusuke’s to pass the baton again and again. It’s a feeling that Yusuke still hasn’t got used to, the rush that comes with it, the way he feels lit up from the inside.

Eventually the shadow melts away to reveal a girl – young and pretty, baby-faced. _I killed her because she got in the way,_ she simpers, big pleading eyes dialed up to eleven. She turns to Ann. _You understand, don’t you? You’d do the same, wouldn’t you? For your boyfriend?_

Joker snorts in a pointed way that makes Yusuke certain he’s missed something.

_Uh, no,_ Ann says, her lip curled.

In the safe room after, Yusuke has to sit with his head hanging down between his knees, he’s so drained. Joker comes along and rests his hand between Yusuke’s shoulder blades. Yusuke feels the warmth of it zing right up and down his spine. It’s so – so good.

“You did so well,” Joker says, except it’s Akira’s voice, softer, gentler. Yusuke feels dazed. “So, so well. Amazing.”

He closes his eyes and soaks it up.

**ii.**

The karaoke place is a little more expensive than their usual celebration spots, but Ann gets this look in her eye and suddenly they’re inside, sipping overpriced drinks with little umbrellas.

She’s in her element, poring over the English-language catalogue of songs. The one she eventually picks is too complicated for Yusuke to follow properly, but it’s pure bubblegum, with a deceptively strong beat.

Ryuji holds up his phone.

“I’m filming it for Suzui-san!” he explains, when Ann yelps and throws a cushion at him. She softens then, and gives the camera this genuine, beaming smile, tucking her hair shyly behind her ear.

_Ah_ , Yusuke thinks.

When Ann takes her bow and sits back down on the bench, Akira moves to make room for her. He winds up plastered all against Yusuke’s side, knee to hip. He’s warm and loose, expansive. Happy. Yusuke tries not to stare.

Ann gets up to sing again, sharing the mic with Ryuji this time. When she sits back down, she plops herself in Akira’s lap. His hands come up to gently hold her thighs, helping her stay in place without a shred of self-consciousness. Ann says something into his ear. Akira’s broad hands shift with her when she rebalances her weight, keeping her safe. Yusuke looks, looks, can’t help looking.

**iii.**

Akira starts inviting him to hang out at Leblanc. He walks around cooking curry with Morgana curled up along his shoulders, and it’s unbearably – it’s – it’s just so…

“Ah, this is good!” Yusuke says, when he touches the spoon to his mouth. Akira chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck.

Akira rough-houses with Ryuji, giving noogies, laughing. He puts a casual arm around Ann when they’re out together and boys start sniffing round. That’s what he’s willing to give – reassurance, and encouragement, and protection. He’s a natural at it.

He’s careful around Yusuke, hesitant. It’s the way it has to be. Yusuke worries sometimes that Akira can see inside him, as if Yusuke was another shadow - so he stays away.

**iv.**

The movie is a good choice for all of them – there’s a romance for Ann, who loves to watch rom-coms and then explain afterward why the female lead is way too good for the guy, there are elaborate costumes for Yusuke, there’s yakuza drama for Ryuji, and Akira is a fan of the director. It’s a great choice.

“Wait, where is everyone?” Yusuke asks, when he finds Akira waiting alone in the lobby. His shirt is open at the throat, and his hair has curled up in the rain.

“Ann got a text from Suzui-san last minute, saying visiting hour was moved to tonight for this week,” Akira explains. “Ryuji took her on the train.”

“Oh,” Yusuke says.

“So it’s just us,” Akira says.

“Oh,” Yusuke says.

Halfway through the movie, Akira’s hand touches the back of his, where it’s resting palm down on the armrest. Yusuke freezes. It feels as though all the blood in his body migrates to the back of his hand, magnetized.

Akira touches again, more firmly. He prods with a fingertip until Yusuke, heart hammering, turns his hand over.

Akira touches their palms together, and keeps them that way for the last hour of the movie.

**v.**

Akira lets go of his hand when the titles have finished scrolling by, and the lights come back up.

“Come back to Leblanc for some dinner?” he suggests, voice easy. Yusuke nods shakily.

It’s a long train ride home. The subway is busy, so they hang on to the overhead straps. They wind up pressed against one another when the train goes particularly fast, and makes an older woman knock into Yusuke, sending him stumbling forward. 

Once they’re inside, Akira closes the front door of the café and leans up against it. He studies Yusuke intently, cocking his head.

“In the movie theatre,” he says. “That was okay?”

Yusuke swallows against his dry throat.

“Yes,” he says. 

Akira nods to himself.

“Okay,” he says. He sounds uncertain for perhaps the first time Yusuke has ever heard. “Good. I thought maybe you –“

He shakes his head and smiles to himself.

“Yusuke. Tell me what you want?” he says. It’s not an order – that’s not his Joker voice – it’s a request, and that’s worse.

“I –“ Yusuke tries, and then he can’t go on.

Akira comes away from the door, and sits next to Yusuke in the booth. He puts his hand on the vinyl in the space between them.

“Tell me,” he says, “if it’s not okay.”

Yusuke waits. Akira moves his hand to take Yusuke’s again. Yusuke tries not to cling too hard, though what he wants is to pull Akira over, into him. It's a huge desire, massive, engulfing him.

Slowly, Akira slides over the vinyl, coming closer. He puts his other hand on the back of Yusuke’s neck, just rests it there.

“That’s good?” Akira asks.

Yusuke can’t keep his eyes open. He can’t remember the last time someone touched him like this, so patiently, with so much love.

“Yes,” Yusuke sighs, with a little hitch in the middle.

Then he remembers himself.

“You don’t have to,” he says. He knows he should move away, but he can’t make himself. 

“I want to,” Akira says. When Yusuke risks a look, there’s a tender expression on his face.

The rain patters against the windows. The world outside must still be turning, but it isn’t a world Yusuke can make himself worry about, not right now. Maybe not ever again.


End file.
